Hey you guys! Just a friendly little reminder: summer’s not over for like six more days, so make ‘em count! 

Song of the day: We’re a few short nights away from September 21st, so we only think it’s right to be playing this on repeat.  

Need to vent? Want advice? Have feedback? We wanna hear from you! And while you’re at it…listen to Are You Mad At Me? wherever you listen to podcasts!

How to Stop Making All the Effort in a Friendship  

 question 
For years, I’ve been the friend who checks in, makes plans, and keeps everyone connected. Lately, though, I’ve felt exhausted from always being the one to take the initiative. I know everyone is busy, so I’m scared that if I step back, my friendships will fizzle out. How do I let go of that responsibility without feeling like I'm giving up on the people I care about?—G.

 answer 
When you’re the only one handing out friendship bracelets instead of collecting them, things can start to feel exhausting. Stepping back after keeping everyone connected for so long can feel like you’re abandoning your friendships, but you have to remember that you have your own life, too.

Maintaining a friendship shouldn’t be something you have to carry all by yourself. A couple of other things to remember when you’re feeling guilty?

• Relationships work two ways. Relationships are give and take. You can still care deeply about your friends without always being the first one to text, make the reservation, or organize the trip. Stepping back isn’t giving up; rather, it’s making space for other people to show up, too.

• Things won’t fall apart just because you take a step back. Life gets busy, and friendships may naturally go through quieter seasons, but genuine connections can survive a little space. If a friendship only exists because you’re constantly keeping it afloat, that’s a lot of responsibility to carry, and it’s okay to stop feeling like it’s yours alone.

What to Do When Your Job Isn’t What You Were Promised

 question 
A big reason why I took my new job is because my last role had terrible work-life balance, and this company promised a much healthier culture. Now I’m getting emails at 10 p.m. and worrying I’m heading down the same path. How can I get ahead of this without hurting my reputation at a new job?—E.

 answer 
It’s all fun and games until the “amazing” work/life balance culture isn’t actually all that amazing once you sign the contract. The good news? Setting boundaries early can help prevent unhealthy expectations from becoming the norm in your new gig.

Let’s talk about how you can protect yourself without feeling like you’re putting your new job at risk…

Set boundaries early on. You don’t have to answer emails at 10 p.m. just because someone else does. Protect your time, communicate clearly, and remember that being available 24/7 isn’t the same thing as being good at your job.

Focus on your own work and results. Make sure your work speaks for itself. Advocate for yourself by documenting your accomplishments and communicating your wins along the way. Sometimes the people who look the busiest get attention, but it’s about doing the actual good and meaningful work in the end. 

Decide what success actually looks like for you. A promotion isn’t worth much if it requires sacrificing every evening, weekend, and ounce of your sanity. It’s okay to be ambitious while also deciding that your life outside of work deserves to be a priority. Say it with us “mental health is wealth.”

Got a Q? We wanna hear it here!

…while you have Lucky Charms for lunch for the third day in a row.

We’re declaring it officially soup season! And we’re kicking off the season with FoodFromVt’s Creamy Sausage Gnocchi soup. Have a good soup recipe? Reply to this email and send it to us to share!

Now listening: The Too Much Podcast with Emma Klipstein. Preach! 

Always in our feels when we scroll through Amy Kay’s poems. ❤️

Thanks so much for rocking with us today. See you again soon!

—Rod and Gabi