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Should you be friends with your boss?
Don't lose yourself helping others
Hi guys! Welp, Punxsutawney Phil predicted six more weeks of winter on Groundhog Day, which is the perfect excuse to continue couch rotting until we see the sun again.
Today’s tunes: Finally! Beyoncé won her first-ever Album of the Year Grammy for Cowboy Carter, so we’re turning up the volume and two-stepping to it all week long. Care to join?
Need some advice? We have an A for you here!
Should You Be Friends With Your Boss?
question
I’ve always been good friends with my bosses in the past and while I respect my manager at my new job, I don’t really see us being buddies. How do I make sure to set boundaries up front? —V.
answer
It can be nice to have a friendship with your boss (just look at us two!), but it’s definitely not a mandatory part of your job description. While we’ve both been lucky to have close connections with our managers, you’re not always going to want to hang out with them at happy hour, and that’s totally fine! Let’s talk about two things to remember if you want to set this boundary up front.
Communicate clearly: Just because you’re drawing a line, doesn’t mean it needs to come off in a rude way. In your next 1:1, try saying something like: “I enjoy working with you and appreciate the professional environment here. I do however prefer to keep my work and personal life separate, though, so I like to maintain boundaries outside of work.”
This lets your boss know that 1) you’re not trying to trade friendship bracelets with them but also 2) you’re not mad at them. 🙂
Don’t feel obligated to justify yourself: Your boundary setting needs no explanation. But if you’re afraid of hurting your boss’ feelings, saying something along the lines of: “This is not a reflection of you whatsoever, but keeping my work and personal life separate helps me stay focused on my work.”
Short, sweet, and to the point. Plus, it will show them you’re serious about your role!
How to Support Your Friend Without Losing Yourself
question
My closest friend is going through a hard time working through a divorce. I want to be there for her, but I find it mentally draining to be around her as she sorts through her trauma. How can I be a good friend to her while still protecting my own mental health? —L.
answer
It sucks to see our friends hurting, but supporting them through their tough time can definitely be a lot! In order to show up for them, you have to make sure you’re taking care of yourself first. A few things that will help you in this sitch?
Set boundaries in a loving way Let your friend know you want to be there for them, but you’ve got to look out for yourself so you can do just that! If they’re a true friend they’ll understand and want you to be your healthy and best self.
Schedule check-ins Create a routine where you can be there for your friend with a sense of balance. Suggest meeting up or connecting on certain days of the week, so you're not feeling on-call 24/7. This way, both of you know when you'll be available, which can make it easier for you to manage your mental load.
Encourage them to seek professional help While you’re advice is great and appreciated, a therapist is professionally trained to help others navigate tough times. Encourage your friend to look into therapy or other resources that can help them more than you can.
Got a Q? We wanna hear it here!
…after you eat an entire box of Thin Mints for lunch.
Giada Delaurentiis swears her childhood recipe of chocolate pasta feels just like a hug. And well, we’re big fans of hugs, chocolate, and pasta, so we might just have to give it a try. Let us know if you’re brave enough to try it, too!
Take us back to the simple days of the Disney Channel commercials that we all dreamed of being in. 😍
Diet Cherry Coke that was discontinued in 2020, is making a comeback this summer with blast from the past cans. “Spectacular gimme 14 of ‘em right now.”
Thanks for hanging with us today! Go do something fun for yourself this week, you deserve it. See you back here next week, same place, same time!
—Rod and Gabi
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